aron_kristina: Garbo being fab! (Default)
[personal profile] aron_kristina
In my quest to get people to write more yummy porn for me to read I hereby present the first part of my guide to writing femslash. This part focuses on the actual acts of sex between women and not the writing of it. That comes in part two.

So without further ado I present:

How To Write Femslash
Part 1
Lesbian Sex 101

First, some notes on word choices. I will refer to sex between women as lesbian sex, even if that isn't necessarily correct (and neither, really, is sex between women), because it is easier for me to do so. I will refer to people as women, but things in here might, of course, be true for people who don't call themselves women. However, to make this easier to read I will just use women.

1. Body

The Vagina and vulva

Now, the vagina is technically just the vaginal canal, if you so wish, and the vulva is the outer part of the genitals. So now you know! I’m gonna stick to medical terms in this, and make it as sort of dry as possible, because I want to! It’s not really important in real life though, people will probably know what you mean.

This is a drawn overview of the vulva. Yes, I know it says vagina, whatever.

As you can see, we have outer and inner labia, and then, from the top down, the clitoris, the urethral opening and the vaginal opening. Not so difficult, right?

I would like to take this opportunity to suggest something to you, dear reader, and that is to take a handheld mirror, lie down on a nice surface, for instance a bed, and look at your own genitals. It’s a practice that comes from women's groups in the seventies, I think,, when women tried to reclaim the right to their own pleasure and bodies, and this is actually a good way to do that, no matter what your genitals look like. If you want, you can also masturbate and see the difference between not turned on and turned on, and post orgasmic and so on. (Yes, I’ve done this myself and it is more fascinating than you might think. Then again, I’m a med student.)

Betty Dodson’s Vulva Illustrations

Also, for your benefit, The Great Wall Of Vagina
It’s an exhibition with loads of plaster casts of vulvas, which does show the rather large natural difference there is. It’s all good, people!

The Clitoris

The clitoris gets it’s own section since it is the ‘queen of orgasms’. Most (but not all) women need clitoral stimulation to come.

The part of the clitoris which you can see is called the glans or head. It comes in various shapes and sizes.

It continues in the clitoral body, which can’t be seen.

Here is a drawn sketch of the clitoris I recommend viewing all the illustrations.

As you can see, the clitoris is actually quite large.

When a woman becomes aroused the clitoris gets filled with blood and gets erect. It retracts a bit inside the clitoris hood, which is one of the reason that you generally have to touch it harder the more you get turned on.

The vaginal canal and the hymen myth

The vaginal canal is a structure that, once a woman is turned on, can stretch quite a bit. It also stretches in childbirth, so generally, a rather stretchy structure, all things told. This is because it’s lined with muscles, and also because of the lining of the vagina, which is rather sturdy.

This is a picture of the placement of the vaginal canal inside the body

The vagina can stretch enough to allow fisting, should people so want.

The hymen is a made up structure. It’s generally described as something that will break when you first have intercourse. I can not stress enough that THIS IS WRONG!

What women do have though is a vaginal corona. It’s a membrane that surrounds the vaginal opening, and it covers the vaginal opening when the baby still isn’t born. It does however perforate shortly after birth. In case it doesn’t you need to perform surgery.

It’s not possible to use the vaginal corona to see if someone has been penetrated by a penis sized object or not. Sometimes it’s possible to see if someone has given birth, but sometimes not.

Penetrating the vagina the first time with a large enough object may stretch the vaginal corona, and that may hurt, but it may also not hurt, and having had PIV (penis in vagina) sex before is not a guarantee it won’t hurt.

Bleeding and pain can also be signs of tension and not being turned on enough, so there’s really no way to tell how much the vaginal corona is responsible for this.

This is a PDF of the translated booklet the Swedish Association for Sexuality Education made when the phrase vaginal corona was first coined (slidkrans in Swedish), in case you want more info.

Gonna finish this vulva and vagina section with a documentary on vaginal plastic surgery

It’s very interesting, but it does have some surgery shots, so be warned!

To summarize the documentary: don’t have cosmetic plastic surgery on your vulva (and by cosmetic I do indeed mean surgery to make it look better). It already looks good! However, if you do experience problems in any way, seeing a gynecologist of midwife might be a good idea.

Anus and rectum

Yes, lesbians can have, and enjoy, anal sex too, so I’m just gonna do a short overview.

The walls of the rectum are very thin, which means it’s a sensitive place. Do not, under any circumstances, put sharp things up there.

The anus has two sphincters, internal and external. The external is under voluntary control while the internal is not. This is the reason that you need to consciously relax and take your time if you want to penetrate the anus. If you’re tense, or perhaps a bit uncertain about whether or not you want to have anal sex it’s possible that you can’t relax properly no matter how long time you take.

2. Having Sex

This section shouldn’t by any account be taken as a comprehensive guide to all the dirty stuff two (or more) women can do to each other but rather a starting point.

That would be “with hands”.

One thing, which was pointed out to me by [personal profile] dharma_slut is nails. Now, of you’ve watched the kind of lesbian porno that is aimed at straight men, or even regular straight porn aimed at straight men, you might have noticed the nails. The very long nails. I don’t know about you, but if I have sex with someone I prefer their hands without centimeter-long sharp weapons of vaginal wall destruction at the end of their hands. This isn’t to say you can’t have long nails and have lesbian sex, just that you shouldn’t perhaps stick them up someone without asking first. (also, as a med student I feel the need to point out how unhygienic long nails are...) It can also be a problem if your nails have sharp edges. Some people are more bothered about this than others, I think it might have to do with technique.

Moving on. There are of course loads of thing you can do with hands. Not just to the vagina and vulva but to the whole body. Let’s focus on the nether regions though.

The vagina can be stimulated in various ways, from soft to hard, on the labia, the clitoris, basically all around. You can also use your fingers to penetrate someone. Wow, this is really helpful, isn’t it? The thing is, different women like different things, and as long as you’re careful and listen to your partner there’s not really a lot that can go wrong.


The act of rubbing vulvas together, or rubbing vulvas against other body parts. Also known as tribbing. Frottage is of course the same thing, except tribadism is a lesbian specific word. I’m not gonna write a lot about this but just leave you with some links.

This link is text only
This link is also text only
This link is NSFW. It contains pictures. Yummy pictures


As one might imagine, the art of stimulating the vulva with your mouth. General rules here are don’t start out too hard, listen yo your partner and be careful with teeth. Variation is good.

Babelands guide. Contains some product placement, just ignore that :p
A personal text, but very good


I’m not gonna go into detail here but instead leave you with a link. Also Babeland, same procedure applies

3. Other thing to note

Sex Safety

The risk of transmitting STIs is much smaller in sex between women than it is when a penis is involved (for the obvious reason that if you get semen inside your body it tends to stay there for a while, thus giving infections longer time to spread), but it is possible. Even if some people seem to think it isn’t. I actually had to raise my hand during a lecture on STIs and point out that STIs can transmit between women, to which the lecturer said of course, as if I was stupid for wanting to be mentioned and included. Ah, med school.

Anyway, things you can do (but which are, in my circles at least, very rarely used) are latex/vinyl/nitril gloves and dental dams. Now, the gloves are probably obvious, the dental dams perhaps less so. They’re used in various kinds of oral, and are basically a latex sheet you hold against the vulva or anus and then lick on it. I have been told that you should put a drop of lube between the latex and the parts being licked, but I haven’t actually tried this, so I don’t know.

Sex while bleeding (having your period, for example) radically increases the risk of transmitting HIV, Hepatitis C and Syphilis.

Something else to note, which isn't to do with STis but with Sex Safety are the bacteria you have in your body, especially those in the digestive system. Never, and I mean never, put anything that has been in contact with the anus or rectum in contact with the vagina without washing it first. Never!

Also, while on the subject of hygiene, don't wash you vulva with soap.


Leaving you with two links here

This is not a subject on which I have great personal experience, so if you have any links to people who say it better, please share.


As we age, or bodies change. For women, menopause is the most drastic change. Now, this is not not something I have experienced (yet), so all I know is what I've read. Apparently vaginal dryness seems to be the single largest problem. Lube is your friend.

I don't have anything specific to add to this section, I just felt it needed to be addressed.

4. Further reading

I'm quite certain I've made stupid mistakes, left things out or just been plain wrong somewhere. Please don't hesitate to bring that up in comments. Or anything else you might think of or want to share. Anon commenting is on.

Of course, the brainstorm post is open in case you want to talk about the next part in the series, writing sex!

Another science geek here

Date: 2011-09-21 12:05 am (UTC)
sasha_feather: drag queen with red boot (kinky boots)
From: [personal profile] sasha_feather
Thanks for this!

I would recommend including here: yeast infections and UTIs (urinary tract infections) are the common things to look out for if you've been having sex, especially as consequences to less-than-stellar hygiene, and which good hygiene will usually (but not always) prevent. Washing hands before and after sex is always a good idea, and washing toys also.

Just out of curiosity, what's the problem with washing a vulva with soap?

Re: Another science geek here

Date: 2011-09-21 03:03 am (UTC)
laceblade: Kumiko and Reina from Hibike! Euphonium anime, Reina holding Kumiko's face w/one hand, faces close enough to almost touch. (Sailor Neptune)
From: [personal profile] laceblade
Soap can irritate/inflame.
Mostly: the pH balance down there is pretty delicate and self-maintaining, so the best thing to do is just rinse with water and let your body do its thing.

Some women only use soap to begin with because they think they need to get rid of natural body smells, etc.

Date: 2011-09-21 02:52 am (UTC)
fitz_y: Katharine Hepburn in drag - close up of her cheekbones (Default)
From: [personal profile] fitz_y
niiice post. informative and well-written! i like the link to all the tribbing pictures, too. unf. :-)

Date: 2011-09-22 02:55 pm (UTC)
lexigent: A person in a chunky jumper holding a cup of coffee. (Default)
From: [personal profile] lexigent
I shall follow your writing on femslash with a keen interest. I've never written pr0n of any flavour in my life but you may yet convince me :)

Date: 2011-09-24 03:33 pm (UTC)
ardhra: Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs lying on the stage at the Sydney 08/01/2010 concert (stage goddess)
From: [personal profile] ardhra
People with long fingernails certainly can and do have manual sex, including fisting. See link:

Date: 2011-09-24 10:11 pm (UTC)
oparu: (asoiaf catelyn red)
From: [personal profile] oparu
Thanks for this! It's very informative and I love your medical student student fascination. I learned so much with a mirror. ;)

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